


She Was a Storm (All Night Long)

by NaomilyClexa



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Clarke, Clarke is a bad driver, Clarke likes to draw Lexa, F/F, F/M, Festivals, Flash Forward, How Do I Tag, Idiots in Love, Lexa is a cute puppy, Lexa likes disney songs way too much, Lexa's hair flow in the wind when she sticks her head out of the car's window, Photographer Lexa, Road Trips, Sad Lexa, Slow Burn Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Summer, Summer Love, Summer Vacation, Sunsets, Tattoos, and then shit goes down, away from her problems hah, clarke and lexa run away into their own world, clarke designs lexa's tattoo, even her songs, even while she's supposed to be driving, falling asleep in the back of the car, i can't get over lexa being happy, lexa likes to run a lot, lexa plays guitar, lexa takes everything too seriously, this is what happens when you watch kiss me while listening to supergirl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2017-02-20
Packaged: 2018-06-07 11:27:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6801835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaomilyClexa/pseuds/NaomilyClexa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke Griffin goes to her mother's engagement party to get to know her new step-sister.<br/>Only to find out she's known her all along. Way too well.</p><p>The one in which 25 years old Clarke finds out her step-sister is a girl she fell in love with back at college when she went on a road trip with her. The girl she's never expected to see again. The girl she's supposed to spend the whole wedding with.<br/>They parted for a reason, and now all the memories of that summer came rushing back.</p><p>Basically a road trip au with loads of smut and fluff and some angst. Clexa are soulmates</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Reunion

**Author's Note:**

> Summer is behind the corner, and I need some road trip clexa in my life. So one day, I was watching Kiss me AND then listening to Supergirl and this idea occured to me. Boom. Angsty road trip clexa.
> 
> First of all, I'd like to thank my beautiful beta littlecupcake who helps me with all my stupid mistakes and bears with my grammar.
> 
> Secondly, I'm grateful for 2worldscreationsfolly's help. She gives me ideas and helps me with this story as well, go check out her stories! So thank you both, you're amazing and I'd be lost without you.
> 
> I hope you guys like it! So here goes the first chapter!

1

 

Clarke loved lazy mornings. The feeling of her soft blankets wrapped around her, the sun shining inside through the open curtains, the smell of coffee brewing somewhere in the kitchen, the way she can just stretch, yawn, and carry on laying in her comfortable bed, squeezing her eyes a little because of the sharp light in the room.

This wasn’t one of those days, even though the bed was begging her to stay.

As soon as the 27-year old blonde opened her eyes, she jumped off her bed so quickly her head started to spin and her vision blackened, causing her to hold on to the headboard, grasping it tightly. She groaned, shut her eyes closed, and once she was sure where up and down was and she felt her feet touching the ground as they were supposed to, she shook her head a bit, stepped into her slippers and exited the bedroom, looking back at the sleeping body laying half-naked on top of the sheets. She smiled a bit at the man, and then she shut the door behind herself as quietly as she could, cursing a bit at the creaking sound it gave out.

She tiptoed into her kitchen where she grabbed an apple, bottle of juice from the fridge and some painkillers, putting it onto the table. She then rushed into the bathroom where she went through her morning routine and tried to tame her crazy locks by tying them in a neat ponytail. Well, maybe neat was an exaggeration. But she was already late, so there was no time for combing.

She changed from her nightgown into the most formal dress she could lay her hands on the night before, pale blue summer dress with some lace on the back. It was hugging her boobs maybe too tightly, but she couldn’t be bothered.

When she was finished, she put on her jacket, grabbed her big suitcase and her keys, and went for the door, turning the keys in the lock to open the door, and why is still so hard for her to get used to their new key? _Their new key_. Clarke stopped her movements, stilling her hand. She lifted her other hand, her eyes fixing on the silver band wrapped around her ring finger. It was getting heavier the longer she eyed it. With a long sigh, she rested her forehead against the cool surface of their front door, closing her eyes.

“Clarke?”

She jumped up, turning around to face her fiancé standing in front of her, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion and concern. As usual. The blonde steadied her breathing and put on a small smile, her fingers still curled around her keys.

“Hey, Finn,” she greeted him, “I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“It’s okay, I’m glad I get to see you before you take off,” he confessed, stepping closer to her, “At least I get to wish you safe flight.”

“Well, wish me safe flight,” she pursed her lips, and the man chuckled, approaching her so he could put his arms around her and go in for a soft kiss. It wasn’t long, and as soon as it ended, Clarke pulled away, cleaning her throat, glancing at her watch, “I really need to go, I can’t afford to miss the plane and I need to get some things done first.”

“I get it,” he murmured, “I’m just really sad I can’t go with you.”

“Hey,” she soothed her hand over his cheek, “It’s your work, I get it. Mom gets it, too. It’s not your fault stupid Murphy won’t take your shift this week. And you can still make it for the wedding, right?”

“I hope so. I mean, you go have fun with your new family and I’ll stay here, making money for us-“

“Finn!” she scowled at him,” Don’t guilt me into feeling bad about leaving you and staying here! I’m not happy you can’t come with me either, but I have to go.”

“I know,” he nodded, “It’s just… I’m doing this for _you_.”

Punch in the chest. He always looked so exhausted whenever he talked about his job.

“Of course you are,” she almost whispered, her eyes not leaving his. But he looked away. Clarke moved closer to the door again, “Gotta go. I need to catch some taxi,” she spared him one small smile, grabbed her bags and called the elevator. She was about to step into it when Finn ran after her, barefoot.

“Wait!” he handed her the apple, the bottle of juice and the painkillers from the table, “You forgot this.”

“Thanks,” she gave him a peck in the lips, “What would I do without you?”

She let the question hover in the air between them, stepping into the lift. The door shut closed, and Clarke exhaled, swallowing the pill and downing it with the juice. Once outside, she placed the bags on the pavement next to her feet and hailed the first taxi she could see. She felt Finn watching her from the window as she got into the taxi, tucking her suitcase on the seat next to her. She didn’t look back.

 

It was long after dark once the taxi taking her from the Reagan National Airport pulled up in front of her mother’s enormous house in American University Park. Before she even got to the airport back in NY, she had to take care of some other business, including quick gift shopping and a visit to the hairdresser. She tipped the driver, dragged her suitcase out of the taxi and waved after him, staring at the sight in front of her. The property was bordered by a freshly painted white fence framed with a few tall trees, the path leading to it inlaid by smooth stone pavement, the wooden façade of the huge house painted pale blue, its tall windows white. There was a rhythmic music coming from the backyard, accompanied by chippering and laughter. The engagement party was in full swing and Clarke was late. Once again. She paid no attention to the foreign black car parked on the driveway and headed towards the wooden door, turning the knob to open it and get her suitcase in. She shrugged off her jacket, fixed her messy hair (she shouldn’t have taken a nap on the plane) and put on a smile, ready to greet her mom and Kane.

Kane. She still couldn’t get over the fact that there was someone new in her mother’s life, nor could she comprehend that the man also happened to be a Senator, who also happened to be loaded. Not like the Griffins were ever poor, considering Abigail Griffin was one of the most praised surgeons in all of D.C., but it was nothing compared to the payment of the Senator himself. She couldn’t understand how her mom could be getting married soon again. She was starting a new _family_.

The blonde’s white high heels clicked on the floor as she walked towards the glass doors leading to their garden, and she was so focused on not falling in her killer shoes that she didn’t notice someone else making their way from the staircase, bumping into them, causing them to drop their glass of wine, shattering into million pieces on the ground, the red liquid spilling everywhere, flowing towards Clarke’s heels.

“Shit! I am so sorry! I’m just not used to wearing high heels and I wasn’t paying attention-“

“It’s alright,” a soft, yet strong feminine voice answered her, and she slowly looked up to face a woman that was definitely new to their family meetings. She was just a bit taller than her, her dark brown hair braided in complicated braids, her full lips firmly set into a thin line. She was breath-taking even in the dim light of the hallway they were standing in, her green eyes shimmering, reflecting the light from outside. And she was so familiar. So awfully familiar. Clarke swallowed, and the woman ran her hand over her green skirt, straightening it even though it was perfectly ironed. She guessed it was a habit. No, she _remembered_ it was a habit, “I didn’t intend on finishing that wine, anyways,” the corners of her mouth twitched up, but her eyes were wide, full of fear, full of unspoken words, and Clarke had to stare back at the beautiful woman, her hands shaking, “I’ll get someone to clean it up.”

She turned on her heel, and Clarke watched as she walked away, her hips swaying confidently as she pushed the glass door open. Clarke followed every movement she made with her eyes, her breath getting caught in her throat, and everything around her started spinning with rage, when suddenly someone threw themselves at her and she barely managed to stay on her feet, balancing a bit.

“ What the- Octavia!” she exclaimed when she noticed who was currently hanging around her neck and hugged the girl back, laughing into her hair, “ I haven’t seen you for so long!”

“Right back at cha, Griffin!” Octavia grinned when she pulled away from her. She hasn’t changed much since she last saw her on Christmas, but still, she seemed more confident, glowing even, “Gosh, I couldn’t wait to see you again! I miss not seeing your annoying face every day.”

“Likewise, O,” Clarke smirked, “I’m really sorry. I wish I could visit you guys more often, but school’s keeping me busy, and Finn-“

“Proposed,” Octavia breathed out, stunned. Clarke wanted to ask how the Hell she knew that, but then Octavia took Clarke’s left hand into hers, and everything made sense.

“Yeah,” Clarke nodded, staring at the ring once again, “He did. Last week, actually.”

Octavia smacked her. Hard.

“Ouch! How did I deserve that, O?” Clarke frowned at the younger girl currently pouting at her.

“You got engaged and you didn’t tell me immediately! I’m your best friend! You were supposed to call me right after he put the ring on, Hell, you should’ve called me right after he got on his knees!” she narrowed her eyes, “ Does Raven know?”

Clarke kept silent, biting her lip, which resulted into Octavia widening her eyes.

“She _does_ know! You told Raven, but you didn’t tell me! You deserve another punch!”

“Don’t be so aggressive,” Clarke tried to calm the girl down, because even though Octavia was much shorter than she and weighed about nothing, she did have some serious strength, “I told Raven, because in case you haven’t noticed, she lives in the same city I do, while you live here! And also, Raven can keep her mouth shut. I knew once I told you, you would run after mom and tell her, and I didn’t want that.”

“You thought I wouldn’t be able to keep your secret?” she placed her hand on her heart, looking like a kicked puppy. Clarke raised her eyebrows.

“You outed me to my mom by accident when we were watching _Buffy_ , so yeah, I don’t think you would be able to keep silent about it.”

“Point taken,” Octavia shrugged, “But still, I’m endlessly hurt, and you’re going to have to make it up to me somehow.”

“Will the post of my maid of honor do?”

“And we’re even!” Octavia smiled, “But I get to pick out the dress, your taste is terrible.”

“What’s wrong with my taste?”

“My dear Clarke,” she said sweetly, “May I remind you about the time you only wore fishnet tops? Or when you wanted to try dreadlocks and ended up looking like a mop-“

“Okay stop,” Clarke sighed, but Octavia didn’t obey.

“… Or when you dyed your hair that horrible shade of pale red-“

“Octavia, stop it!” Clarke clasped her hand over her friends mouth, and exclaimed, jerking away at the feeling of something wet and soft touching her palm, “ You dick! Did you just lick my hand?”

“So what if I did?” Octavia challenged, setting her hands on her hips and popping out her chin. Clarke stared at her for a while, and then jumped at her, holding her hands secure while cleaning her palm onto the back of Octavia’s black dress, “Clarke, you pig!”

“You started it!” Clarke laughed, retreating from moving her hand up and down and rather started tackling her sides until Octavia was collapsing under her touches, giggling like crazy.

“Stop it, you little shit!” she managed to get out between the laughs, trying to pry Clarke’s hands away, “I will kill you in your sleep!”

God knows for how long that fight would’ve gone on if it weren’t for the loud cough that interrupted their moment of complete childishness.

“Whoa, Griffin, you wore this dress to my birthday party two years ago,” Raven appeared behind the corner, glass of red wine in her hand, smirking at the two girls. Clarke immediately went to hug her.

“What are you doing here?” Clarke laughed into her shoulder, and Raven shrugged.

“I’m O’s date,” she confessed, linking hands with the shorter girl as a proof as soon as she pulled away from the blonde and smiled at Octavia. Clarke raised her eyebrows.

“So it’s official? You two are together? For real?” she gestured between the two of them, and the girls nodded in sync, “Wow. Didn’t expect you to be so serious about your occasional hook-ups.”

“Well, if you still lived with me,” Raven glared a bit at Clarke, “Then you would know that we are planning on moving in together. For real.”

“For real?” Clarke voiced her surprise. Both girls nodded again.

“For real,” Octavia affirmed.

“As in, you two together?”

“Yes,” Octavia said in exasperation.

“Living in the same apartment?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Raven rolled her eyes at the blonde.

“Sharing the same bathroom and everything?” 

“ _Yes!_ ” both girls shouted at her, annoyed with her questions. Raven kissed Octavia’s cheek, “We’ve known each other since college, and we keep ending up together. O just found a job at NY, so we decided; _what the Hell_. Besides, she looks really cute when she’s annoyed, I just can’t resist.” 

“Fuck off,” Octavia grinned, “You’re the one who annoys me all the time.”

“Because I love your pout,” Raven reasoned, earning a punch in the shoulder and kiss on the lips, “See? You love me for pissing you off.”

“No other reason to love you,” Octavia poked her tongue out at her, laughing. Raven chuckled and rolled her eyes.

“Save that tongue for later, babe.”

“Gross!” Clarke stuck her finger in her mouth, pretending to gag at the same time when Lexa walked back into the hallway, staring at Clarke with curiosity, along with something that could be labelled as cautiousness. The blonde immediately stood up straighter, and when their eyes met, Clarke glared at her, and the other girl, widening her eyes and pursing her lips, cleared her throat, lifting her chin. But she didn’t fool Clarke with her pretend confidence. Clarke knew her way too well.

“Clarke,” she said with the softest tone possible, “Your mom is waiting for you.”

“I’ll be there in a minute, _Lexa_ ,” she almost spat at her, the name tasting bitter on her mouth, and all the memories rushed back in, because now there was no doubt, this was Lexa, this was the Lexa she knew, the Lexa she – She noticed her eyes started watering up and she sniffled, gathering all her self-control to stop herself from weeping right there on spot, and managed to look back at Lexa who was watching her with so much care she felt like vomiting all over again, “You can go now,” she said as calmly as she could, and with Lexa’s careful eyes lingering on her for a bit longer, the brunette nodded, and slowly, she walked away. Which left Clarke standing there, with her fists clenched and biting at her bottom lip. And also with two curious pairs of eyes waiting for her to spill what that was all about.

“You know her?” Raven wondered, the glass of wine balancing between her thumb and her index finger, the liquid threatening to spill anytime. Clarke avoided their eyes. Instead, she started fiddling with her fingers.

“Yes,” she creaked in her husky voice, feeling the tears in her throat, “Let’s go. Mom’s waiting for me,” she walked by them, not giving them a second glance. She was sure the girls were exchanging looks, though.

The party was in a full swing. People she’s never met and people she wished she’d never meet again were standing gathered in small circles all around the backyard Clarke grew up in, almost everyone holding glasses in their hands, except for little children chasing each other around and Lexa. Lexa, who was standing on the opposite side of the garden, her posture too straight. Clarke stopped herself from looking at her any longer, and, putting on a fake smile, accompanying her mother who immediately brightened up once she saw her daughter. Calling out her name, she handed her glass of wine to the man standing next to her and threw herself at her, hugging the Hell out of her. Clarke exclaimed as the sudden embrace took her breath away for a moment, and then hugged her mom back, smiling.

“Heey, mom,” she whispered into her shoulder, enjoying the feeling of being back in her mother’s arms. Once they separated again, Abby paid Clarke a long look to ensure her daughter was okay and unscratched, and then, she glanced at the man standing next to her, and pushed Clarke towards him.

“Clarke, this is Marcus. Marcus, meet my daughter, Clarke,” she introduced them, and Clarke finally got the chance to look closely at the man that was supposed to be her foster-father in a month. He was tall, dark haired and quite handsome, and he seemed sympathetic enough, the smile on his lips appearing as an honest one. He seemed acceptable for her mom, so she returned the smile, and offered him her hand. He shook it, still smiling.

“It’s really nice to meet you, Clarke. Abby has told me so much about you, and you really live up to the expectations,” he complimented her, and okay, she could like the guy. If he wasn’t trying to replace her dad. _No_. He wasn’t. He wasn’t. Clarke shook her head to get the stupid thoughts and worries out of her head, because she wasn’t going to be like that. Mom deserves to be happy, even after dad is gone. She deserves to enjoy life once again, and Clarke knows it.

Abby seemed satisfied with the way the two took off, and she turned around to take a spoon from the table and clicked it against her glass of wine, getting everyone’s attention. For a moment, Clarke searched for Lexa in the crowd, out of habit, but once she found her and realized she’d been watching them the whole time, she took in a deep breath, rolled her eyes skywards and turned back to her mother. Octavia and Raven joined her in the meantime, gossiping behind her back, possibly about how the Hell Clarke could know the girl.

“Everyone, may I have your attention for a moment,” she raised her voice, and everyone, including the small children chasing each other around, quieted down. Abby smiled, “First of all, I’d like to thank everyone for coming here. It’s really an honor for us to see you all gather here because of us, because of our engagement, of our wedding. I can’t believe that after everything my family has been through,” she connected her eyes with Clarke, who smiled back in support, “I finally found happiness again, with this man,” she placed her hand on Kane’s shoulder, who smiled back affectionately, and Octavia and Raven ‘aww-ed’ behind her.

“I will always be grateful for that, for getting a second chance with someone so amazing. And I would also like to thank my daughter, Clarke, for coming here even though she’s so busy. Thank you, darling,” she caressed her cheek, “Thank you, everyone. I would just like to clarify, the wedding is in a month, and we’re inviting all of you to at Oxon Hill Manor, and of course, you’ll be staying at a hotel, specifically at the Ark hotel. For now, just enjoy the party and have fun. Cheers!” Abby raised her glass, and Kane accompanied her, clinking it with her just as everyone else raised theirs, letting out their ‘cheers’ as well. Clarke clinked hers with the grinning couple behind her, but her eyes found Lexa once again, standing alone in the corner next to Clarke’s cousin.

“Everyone!” Raven raised her voice, getting their attention for once again, and Clarke feared the words that might come out of her mouth, “I would like to thank Abby and Marcus for inviting us and for throwing this great party, but I would also like to have a toast for their daughter, Clarke!” she winked at the blonde, and Clarke knew exactly what was coming, and there was no stopping Raven, “Who is getting married to her boyfriend and my good friend, Finn! So cheers to Clarke!” she leaned in to kiss Clarke’s cheek, and Clarke immediately turned to find her mother staring at her with huge eyes, smile frozen on her face, but as soon as she came back to herself, she laughed out and hugged Clarke. Kane congratulated her as well, and just as everyone gathered around her to admire her ring, Clarke found Lexa out of habit, holding her glass, lips set in firm line, staring back at Clarke. Then, she took in a deep breath, and walked away, disappearing into the house. Clarke felt her eyes watering once again, so she blinked the tears away and instead focused on clinking glasses with everyone who came. Lexa didn’t appear for the rest of the party.

 

Clarke was helping her mother dismiss their guests, shaking their hands and thanking them for coming, while Kane and Raven along with Octavia were showing their servants where to put the dirty dishes and gifts. It was around midnight that the last guest left when Clarke sat down on a chair, exhausted, tired from the long day, when Lexa accompanied her, handing her a glass of champagne. Clarke avoided her eyes, and took it from her, careful not to touch her in the process. They sat in silence for a moment, Clarke sipping her champagne, until Lexa spoke up. She could barely make out her face in the dark.

“Getting married, I see,” she commented, her tone cold. Clarke chuckled.

“Yeah. That’s what happens when you love someone, you know.”

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lexa clench her jaw.

“Clarke, I-“

“ _Don’t_ ,” she interrupted her, facing the girl. She still hovered a few inches taller, and gosh, she was just as beautiful as she remembered her, “Don’t apologize, okay? You know what? Don’t talk to me _ever_ again, Lexa, unless it’s something important,” she swallowed, her throat dry, “I have to go now, I can’t be here any longer,” she passed by her, bouncing into her shoulder on the way. She felt Lexa’s eyes on her as she walked away, and her eyes filled with tears. She sat down on the stairs leading to the second floor where her old bedroom was, leaning her elbows against her knees and hiding her face in her hands. She let few tears fall down her cheeks when she felt someone touch her shoulder. Her head jerked up, relieved to find Octavia and Raven instead of Lexa.

“Hey” she piped up, her voice low. Octavia sat down next to her, and Raven stood down by the stairs, looking up at the two girls with a concerned frown on her tanned face.

“What’s wrong, Clarke?” Octavia asked gently, her hand still warming up her skin, “How do you know Lexa?”

Clarke sniffled, wiping her eyes.

“Do you remember the road trip I took the summer after my dad died?” she asked both girls, and they nodded. She had to chuckle bitterly, “Well, meet Lexa, my road trip buddy.”

Both girls gasped, Octavia clenching her fists.

“You mean that’s _the Lexa_?” Raven exclaimed, and Clarke nodded once again, “Holy shit. I had no idea we’d ever see her!”

“She’s hot,” Octavia said, and Clarke glared at her while her girlfriend kicked her in the shin a bit, “What?” she shrugged, rubbing her shin, “Just saying. I’m not saying she isn’t a bitch. She’s walking around with her head held high as if she’s a freaking commander of this place all the time.”

“Yeah, well I-“

“Clarke,” Kane’s voice came from the dark hallway, all three girls looking up at them. Clarke was the first one to notice Lexa standing behind him, her posture erect and her eyes looking down at them in her usual not-bothered manner. Once they laid on Clarke, though, they softened. Clarke was really grateful that in the dark, no one could see her red eyes and the traces after the tears, “I’m glad I found you. The guests kept me so busy I had no time introduce you ladies,” he gestured towards Lexa who stepped closer to them, looking at Clarke, “Clarke, meet Lexa, my daughter, and your soon-to-be stepsister,” he said cheerfully, and that’s when Clarke’s blood got thick in her veins and she was pretty sure everything around her stopped. Octavia’s hand on her shoulder grasped her, “I hope you’ll get along,” he added, and that’s when Clarke stood up, glaring at Lexa.

“ We’ve met,” she said harshly, throwing the most annoyed look at Lexa before turning around on the stairs and walking up to her room. She was pretty sure the scene under her remained the same for at least another minute after she collapsed onto her bed, crying into her pillow.

All the memories from that damn summer rushed back to her. All the memories when she was with _Lexa_.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We find out how the girls met

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!" Yes, I'm still alive, and I am so, so sorry. My laptop broke, and I didn't really feel like writing Clexa, but now I am back and my girlfriend borrowed me her ancient laptop, and thanks to many fanfictios I read, I am ready to write clexa again!
> 
> That being said, I am definitely not happy with this chapter. It took me months to finish it, it was a dead end, and my beautiful betas left me, understandably so, so I am looking for new ones. If you do want to help me, please comment! So I just wanted to get it over with this chapter and maybe I will rewrite it later, but I just had to put it out there so we can move on. 
> 
> Thank you for putting up with me, I promise to udpate much more often, next chapter should be up in a week.
> 
> Remember, English isn't my first language.
> 
> And to all my beautiful women, muslims, poc, lgbtq+ and refugees, this is for you. Our fight is not over

It all happened five years ago. The summer after Clarke’s father died. 

Clarke remembered it as if it were happening right there and then, when she was laying on her back on her bed, hypnotizing the ceiling of her bedroom, dotted with luminous stars. She could smell the salty air blowing around her. She could feel the sand spilling through her fingers, she could taste the feeling of Lexa’s lips against her, rolling it on her tongue. She had a sudden urge to spit. 

She would probably lay in the bed for much longer, running over all the memories from that damned summer, if it weren’t for the grumbling of her stomach. Maybe leaving the party so soon yesterday wasn’t so wise.

Kicking off the soft blankets, Clarke stood up from the bed and after brushing her fingers through her messy hair, she left the room she spent her teenage life in and retreated downstairs to feed her empty stomach. Everyone was already seated there; Octavia and Raven feeding each other, corn flakes all over the table, and Abby watching them with horror written all over her anxious face, and Clarke had to smile. This was how she remembered one of the best years of her life; just the three of them, making Clarke happy, making her forget all the bad things that have happened to her. Only one person was missing.

“Clarke,” Abby looked up to face her daughter, still standing on the stairs she remembers her dad falling from once when he tripped over her sketchbook, “Good morning, baby,” she smiled, putting one plate of scrambled eggs on the table, “Breakfast is ready. Octavia spilled it all over the oven, but that’s…” she waved her hand, taking in a deep breath, “Not important,” she muttered, and oblivious Octavia giggled as Raven threw bread at her. Clarke smirked. 

“I’m sorry for leaving yesterday,” she walked down the stairs, hands on the railings. The young couple snapped back into reality that wasn’t made merely for them and they both grinned at her, “I wasn’t feeling well.”

“Yeah, I wonder why,” Raven murmured, and Octavia smacked her. Abby put her hands on her hips as Clarke took a seat next to Raven.

“I was wondering where you went. After all the guests left, we grilled some cheese and talked. Lexa was asking about you,” Clarke flinched at Abby’s words, but didn’t look up,”Said you two know each other from before. How is that possible?” she frowned, and Clarke took in a deep breath, stabbing at her fried eggs.

“It doesn’t matter. We once run into each other during the summer after dad," not being able to say those words even after so many years, she gulped, "… You know, end of story. Don’t know why she wants to see me so much.” 

“She says she misses you,” Abby noted, and that made Clarke drop her fork, startling everyone in the room. As if on cue, the glassy door leading to backyard opened, revealing tall brunette dressed in black jeans and dark top, immediately stopping in her steps and widening her eyes at Clarke. She put her hands still along her body awkwardly, staring at the blonde with slightly parted, plum lips. Everyone went quiet, until Abby cleared her throat. 

“What’s wrong, darling? Hungry already?” she asked, and Lexa didn’t look up to meet her eyes; her stare was fixated on the blonde, who was currently staring daggers into her.   
“No,” she spoke up, her voice quiet, “Kane just wanted me to tell you he left for the mall to buy supplies for lunch.” 

“Okay, thank you,” Abby smiled, gesturing towards one last empty seat, right next to Clarke, “You can take a seat, I saved some fried eggs for you. And thank you for helping with the car.” 

As if checking how much would Clarke want to kill her if she did take the offered seat, she bit her lip and looked at Clarke again after watching Abby for a while, and finding the younger Griffin returning her stare with cold eyes, she sighed and shook her head. 

“That’s alright. I still have some… Things to do… With the, uhh, car,” she looked away, backing into the open door, “I will see you later,” one last time, she glanced at Clarke, and slowly, she disappeared in the backyard once again, closing the door behind her. The room was silent, until Raven exclaimed. 

“Holy shit, Clarke, are you planning on crushing that fork?” she tilted her head and Clarke noticed her knuckles going white, and let go of the silver fork. 

“That Lexa chick must’ve pissed you off real bad,” Octavia grinned, “ What did she do, she spilled a blue slushie in your car?” 

“I gotta go,” Clarke stood up, pushing her chair back. Ignoring her mother calling after her, she paced to the living room, where she fell into her dad’s favourite armchair and resting her hands against her forehead, she sighed.

Of course, she wasn’t surprised when just seconds after, two pairs of steps followed her, and her best friends stepped in front of her. Both crossing their hands over their chests, mirroring each other, they raised their eyebrows at her. The blonde sighed.

“You wanna know what happened, right?” she breathed out, raising her eyes to meet their curious stares. Raven shrugged.

“You’ve never really told us what went down with her. All we know is she tagged along, and then she left. But you seemed really pissed for seeing her here.”

“It’s almost as if she broke your heart,” Octavia snickered, but after Clarke said nothing, the pair understood, “She did,” Octavia whispered, kneeling down to meet Clarke face to face, “ Clarke, what happened?” 

Hearing the words out loud, Clarke’s eyes watered, and she bit her lip. Immediately, both girls seated themselves on each side of the armchair, wrapping their hands around Clarke’s shaking figure. 

“Clarke, we’re not forcing you to tell us, the slightly taller of the two brushed her hands over Clarke’s arm, “But Octavia and I have always been there for you, and maybe we could help you with it.”

“Clarke, what did she do to you?” Octavia asked in a stern, yet sympathetic voice, and Clarke finally met the brunette’s eyes.

“After the two of you took me to the hotel…” 

 

 

Octavia and Raven really tried to take her mind off of the tragedy that happened to her family, so they chose a week in a hotel in Miami as their form of distraction. And it really did help. Occasionally. Every now and then, when the alcohol the girls poured into her made her forget everything. Every now and then, she felt like everything was back to normal, like everything’s going to be alright. But then the booze exited her system and she was forced to face the harsh reality, which could only be compared to a punch in the face, that kind of punch that makes you wonder if all your teeth are on their supposed place. That kind of punch that makes you think if there is any point in living, when life means being in constant pain, constant disappointment.

She sat by the swimming pool with her legs swung over the edge of the pool, her ankles dipped in the cool water. There were laughing young people all around her, dancing, kissing, doing inappropriate things that should be done in privacy. And there was also Raven, currently howling at the sky as she threw her hands in the air and rested her head against Octavia`s shoulder, leaning into her. Both girls were pretty drunk, and they had every right to be: Octavia just finished her fist year of university as a student of honour and got a scholarship for the next year, and Octavia got her first part-time job in a repair shop. And Clarke wished she could be happy for them, too, she really did, and she wished she could enjoy the fact that this semester was officially over for her and she could move on and do whatever she wanted to do with her life. 

But whenever she closed her eyes and tried to relax, to enjoy the moment, she could hear the scream again. She could see her father`s eyes, never leaving hers until they closed for one last time. She couldn`t unseen her mother`s teary eyes and the screaming of their neighbours. 

 

Raven wanted to go home sooner, she even told Clarke she could stay over at her place, she could find her a job Clarke could work in until she could get herself together. Clarke only smiled at that, because she knew it will never be okay ever again. 

„Clarke?“ The muscular brunette called after her, approaching her from behind and wrapping her arms around her, „Are you okay? You are super quiet tonight, and you haven`t even finished your sex on the beach.“ 

„Well, we`re not at the beach and I`m not having sex, so I see no point in finishing it,“ she retorted, and then sighed when she saw Raven's disappointed look, „Rae, I`m so sorry for being a pain in the ass. I just.... I just can`t believe it.“ 

„I know,“ Raven rounded the girl and crouched in front of her, „Been there, done that. And believe me, even though it never goes away, it gets better. You're a Griffin! You guys always get over everything! Remember that time when you accidentally set your prom dress on fire and managed to turn it into a super cool piece of fashion art? Or when Octavia was stuck in her house and you literally went all MacGyver on us and got her out with a chewing gum and a stick,“ she looked into her eyes, her lips turning up,“You can do this, Clarke.“ 

„Thanks,“ Clarke tried to smile, even though most of the words fell flat on her. She appreciated her friend's effort to try and help her, but the only one that could make everything better was now laying two feet under the ground in the suit he was supposed to wear to her wedding one day, „I`m just tired, I think I`m going to bed,“ she started to get up, and Raven stood up too, her hand on her shoulder. 

„We'll go too. Right, O?" She called after the brunette, and Octavia ran to them with a confused stare, „We'll go back to our room with Clarke because she is feeling shitty, right?“ 

„Definitely!“ Octavia agreed, maybe too enthusiastically, considering she was offering to be a shoulder to cry on when she could party all night, „We'll watch Parks and recs and make it all feel better. Or watch Skins and complain about how they killed the lesbian once again.“ 

Clarke rubbed her eyes, shaking her head, „No, it`s okay. The night is still young, and it's our last night here, you go have fun.“ 

She turned around, ready to leave, but Raven`s strong grip on her upper arm made her turn around. She raised her eyebrow at the girl in question. 

„You're not doing this just so you can sacrifice your needs for our own once again, are you?“ She eyed her worriedly, and Clarke had to swallow down the true answer. 

„Of course not. I just feel like being alone for a while,“ she lied through her teeth, and thanks to saying this sentence for like thousand times in the last week, it sounded pretty believable. Raven wasn't really satisfied with the answer, but slowly, she let go of Clarke's arm and curled it around O instead. Her eyes never left her, though. 

„If anything happens and you need us, you'll call, right?“ She asked, and Octavia tilted her head in concern. Clarke smiled. 

„Of course I will. Now go, I`m pretty sure that tan guy who was eyeing you earlier is handing away free drinks now, so you better get going before everything‘s out of stock,” she rushed them, and with one last stare, Raven finally accepted her defeat and started walking away. 

“We’ve got your back, Griffin,” Octavia called after her before they disappeared, and Clarke waved at her. Then she put on her pullover and instead of heading towards the hotel, she took off in the direction of the beach. 

She felt awful lying to her friends about how she felt, because she really needed to hear their reassuring voices, but she hated robbing them of their summer vacation even more, so she guessed leaving them alone was for the best. And the beach did seem pretty inviting, considering no one should be there by now.   
So she took off, walking through the whole complex to finally join the path that led to the beach, and the spot she was looking for. It was a small log on the edge of the beach where many parties were held for the last few weeks. Clarke could get a beautiful view of the sea and the waves hitting the shore, without having to listen to the annoying thuds of the music that kept ringing in her ears all the damn time. 

Tonight, though, the spot wasn’t abandoned. 

Instead, she could see the back of a girl sitting on the log, dark, brown hair falling down her back, dressed in sport bra that went up to her neck. Clarke was about to tell her to go off, to fuck off of her spot, because no one could take the last piece of calmness away from her. Slowly, she snuck up to the girl, ready to force her to go away. She tapped the girl on her shoulder, surprisingly muscular shoulder, and perhaps she should have noticed the headphones earlier. The girl, clearly not aware she had a company, jumper up from her spot on the bench, grasped Clarke’s arm and twisted it, facing her. And Clarke’s throat went dry. 

If there could be something as ridiculous beauty, the woman’s picture would be next to its definition in a dictionary. Even in the dim light of the distant street lamp casting a warm light on her face, she could see the high cheekbones, furrowed eyebrows and plum lips, and her long, wavy hair framing her face. She was caught off guard, or so it seemed, alarmed by Clarke’s presence, her fists curled. There was sweat forming on her forehead, sparkling even. And her eyes buried into Clarke’s and they seemed to glow, like windows into her soul. The girl was unreal.

After embarrassingly long moment of examining the woman in front of her, Clarke shook her head to get herself back together and cleared her throat, stepping a bit closer to the woman, who seemed to lean away from her, her expression hostile, threatening, even. She still didn’t let go of her arm, and she had some serious grasp.   
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know this place was taken,” Clarke raised her hands.

“No one ever comes here at this time,” the girl answered in a soft, yet cold voice, and gosh, the girl was apparently really territorial, judging by the way she seemed to clutch onto the log. Clarke raised her eyebrows.

“This is a public place and anyone can come here whenever they want. If you think it’s yours, maybe you should mark it,” she retorted, because no matter how blinding the woman’s beauty was, no matter how soft her skin seemed, Clarke was taking no shit from anyone, especially when she just needed to be alone for a while. But the girl’s full lips twitched, almost as if she was fighting a smile, and she straightened her back, relaxing her fists and finally loosing her grip on Clarke. 

“Maybe I should,” she answered lightly, “But I am pretty sure we can share it.” 

Without any further words, she moved so she was sitting on the edge of the bench, so Clarke sighed and approached the bench, sitting down next to the girl cautiously. She tried to sit as far away as she could, trying not to invade her personal space. She leaned against the bench, taking in a deep breath of the salty air blowing around them, and they shared a moment of silence. But the place no longer had the effect she needed, it didn’t have the emptiness, the quietness when she could hear the other girl’s knuckles crack as she stretched her fingers. 

“Maybe I should go,” Clarke suggested, lifting lightly off of the bench, but the girl shook her head. 

“Nonsense. I am okay with your presence. Are you?” she eyed her, and for the first time, Clarke could see her eyes from up close. She guessed they were green, framed with black eye lashes of spectacular length, and they were the deepest and brightest eyes Clarke has ever seen. And suddenly, looking into the woman’s eyes, losing herself in them, she was okay with her presence, she was okay with sharing her secret spot with someone. 

Instead of answering, she smiled a bit.

“I’m Clarke,” she introduced herself, and the brunette returned the smile and offered her a hand after she wiped it into her leggings. Clarke took it hesitantly with a smile.

“Lexa,” she told her, turning her head away to stare into the distance, “Are you staying at the hotel?” 

“Yeah,” Clarke nodded, mimicking Lexa and watching as the waves crushed against the shore. The rocks on each side of the beach were sharp and high, and the waves broke against them, shattering, letting out last cries of hopelessness, “Are you?” 

“No. I am staying at my friend’s place. She lives close by.”

“Must be nice,” Clarke commented, fiddling with her father’s watches around her wrist. Lexa didn’t reply. Okay, probably not a fan of small talk. 

Clarke brushed some of her hair behind her ear. The silence was comforting, calming even, and somehow, the girl sitting next to her made the air around them seem almost soothing. Lexa spoke up again.

“I can’t blame you for seeking this quiet place. The hotel parties can get out of hand quickly.”

“Yeah,” Clarke chuckled, “After a week of it, you just have enough, and you have to leave, at least for a while. Everyone seems to have fun and laugh and they seem careless and…” she shrugged, watching as some couple jogged across the beach, “I just can’t stand it.” 

“Their taste in music is quite terrible, yeah,” Lexa muttered, earning a laugh from Clarke. 

“I feel like they’re playing one song over and over again, except it has slightly different lyrics every time.” 

“That’s called dance music, Clarke," Lexa smirked. 

“Dance music my ass. I can’t dance for a whole week straight,” Clarke complained, shrugging, “I’m too old for that shit.” 

“And old how are you, old bones?” Lexa raised her eyebrows teasingly and Clarke poked her chin out.

“21, mind you,” she said proudly and Lexa chuckled.

“You should retire, soon,” the brunette commented. Clarke nodded slowly. 

“And I am. As soon as I kick my friends off at their place tomorrow, I’m getting- Nevermind,” she waved her head in the air, leaning away from the brunette a bit. But Lexa sat a bit closer. 

“What are your plans?”

“You want he to share my plans for the future with a complete stranger?” She smirked at her, and Lexa smiled. 

“No, that would be stupid. Almost as stupid as being alone with a complete stranger, in the middle of nowhere, at night. You’re smarter than that,” she mocked her, and Clarke had to laugh.After weeks of mourning and pretending to smile, she actually laughed at Lexa’s words. It felt nice. 

“Well, if you insist, I’m planning on taking a road trip. By myself.”

“By yourself?” Lexa raised an eyebrow, “ That could be dangerous.”

“well, I think we have finally clarified that I am not really careful person when it comes to my personal safety,” Clarke said, and it was meant to sound as a joke, but it came of as a bitter remark, and Clarke sighed,”I’m sorry.I’m just not in the best mood today.” 

"I understand,” Lexa nodded, her voice warm, “But you shouldn’t let feelings take over you like that.”

Clarke giggled.

“What, are you my psychologist now?” 

“I’m someone who’s trying to tell you something that has helped me a lot,” Lexa answered, almost too calmly, considering Clarke just snapped at her. 

“Well, thank you for your input, but that’s not really gonna help me now, ”Clarke shrugged, “If it did, I would kiss Bellamy.” 

“Who’s Bellamy?” The girl tilted her head in a manner that was way too adorable for Clarke not to smile.

“No one. Just someone I really wouldn’t want to kiss.”

For the next few moments, the women were surrounded by silence once again, with Lexa hypnotising the beach, and Clarke staring at the moon reflexing in the sea. 

“I have always wanted to leave,” Lexa interrupted the silence, “Just go away, for a while, let go of everything, and just drive.”

"What’s stopping you?” Clarke wondered, and Lexa scoffed.

“Responsibility. My duties. My rent, my family, Not everyone is a careless student who can just pack their MacBook and leave, Clarke," she looked at her, looking almost as if she was too old for her face, and Clarke shook her head, pursing her lips.

“You know, next time before you accuse me of being a useless brat, you could actually get to know me, Lexa,” she spat at her, and started to get up from the bench. Lexa did, too.

“Wait,” she spoke up, “I didn’t mean to offend you. Sometimes I just judge someone way too quickly. I think you may have noticed," she took in a deep breath, guilt spreading over her calm features, "I don't know you, and I have no right to judge you. But I have seen to many of my university classmates just pack their stuff and leave, and it was mostly spoiled kid who had the whole thing covered. I envied them, a lot," she admitted, and Clarke sighed. 

"Well," Clarke smiled, "I am one of those brats, so what about you try to not hate me for it?"

Lexa smiled back, "I'll try, Clarke."

"Good," Clarke nodded, satisfied with her work, "Now, wanna go swimming?" She proposed, turning her head in the direction of the sea behind them. Lexa tilted her head, her eyebrows furrowed. 

"Now? I don't have any swimming costume, and it's dark," Lexa stated, as if Clarke wasn't aware of the fact it was around midnight.

"Yes, neither do I. But you do have underwear, right?" She proposed, and Lexa, understanding Clarke's offer, deepened her frown.

"I am not going swimming in my underwear, Clarke." 

"Why not?" Clarke asked, already backing towards the sea, "It's the same as your bikini, except it doesn't dry that quick. But it's summer, so why the Hell not? And besides, you say you want to do something spontaneous as road trip, yet you don't want to do this? Are you a coward, Lexa?" She held out her hand, offering it to Lexa. The brunette hesitated, hypnotising her hand, and after inhaling deeply, she smiled softly, and took it.

The girls walked closer to the waves and started removing their clothes. Clarke tried to be as cautious as she could not to look at Lexa when she was taking off her top, and as soon as they were undressed, exchanging quick, shy look, they entered the water.

It was definitely much cooler than it used to be during the day, but something about the chilly waves splashing her body, washing it higher and higher as she sank further and further, their surroundings quiet, only the sound of the sea interrupting it. Clarke closed her eyes, putting her hair in a high bun, and completely submerged. She exhaled, letting the water caress her, and then, she turned to look at Lexa. The taller woman was smiling, staring at the moon, her whole face radiating pure happines. Sensing Clarke's stare, she glanced at her, and smiled hesitantly. The blonde smiled back, and together, they just swam there, enjoying the moment.

Until Clarke smirked and splashed water at Lexa. 

"Clarke!" The brunette exclaimed, her mouth wide open, "Why did you do that?"

"To scare away the sharks, obviously," she grinned, and Lexa smiled.

"I am pretty sure splashing would have the opposite effect on sharks," she swam closer to Clarke, and returned the favour. Clarke laughed, and splashed some more, closing her eyes so no salt could enter them. She jumped at Lexa, who sunk into the water, and when she surfaced, she kicked at Clarke's feet, causing her to lose balance and fall.   
"Ohh, I see what's going on here," Clarke chuckled, you're enjoying this, aren't you?" 

" Maybe," Lexa admitted, biting her lip, and then her expression darkened, "But I am sure it's pretty late. I should probably go."

"Wha-Lexa!" Clarke frowned, watching as the girl started swimming towards the beach, and stepped out of water, taking her clothes. Clarke followed her, "What's going on?" 

"I have to go. I am leaving tomorrow, and I have to pack my things," she said without looking at Clarke, and then, once she had all her clothes folded in her hands, she finally looked at her, "I am really glad I got to know you," she smiled slightly, and just like that, she started walking away, the sand sticking to her wet feet. Amdjust like that, Clarke was once again alone, baffled, confused. 

 

"Sure that's everything? Because Octavia does tend to leave things at unexpected places," Raven asked, pacing around their room with her own bag hung over her shoulder. Clarke nodded, lifting her bag off of the freshly made bag. 

"That's it. I checked every drawer there is. No traces of O left."

"Guys!" Octavia frowned, fixing her ponytail, "I am right here, and I am offended. I made sure I didn't leave anything behind," she shrugged, "That's why I never unpacked."

"Wait," raven furrowed her eyebrows at the youngest girl, "How the Hell did you brush your teeth the whole week?" 

"Nevermind, our bus is leaving soon!" Octavia announced, hopping off of the table she was seated on and stopping in front of Clarke, "So, this is it. You sure you don't want to go with us, Griffin?" Octavia asked once more, just to make sure, "We could drive with you. I am sure your aunt wouldn't mind if we crushed at her place, too."

Feeling bad for lying to her friends about where she was going, she swallowed, "I know, but I have to do this alone. My aunt is suffering, her brother just died, and she needs my help," she put her hand on Octavia's shoulder, "I will see you in two months." 

"You'll be missed," Octavia muttered before throwing herself at Clarke, hugging her tightly. Clarke hugged her back, her eyes watering again.

"I will miss you guys, too," she said into O's shoulder, "But I can't be home right now. Everything... I see him everywhere."

"We know," Octavia pulled away, "And we support you. But you do have to text us every day, deal?" O raised one eyebrow, and Clarke laughed. 

"Of course," she turned at Raven, who was examining Clarke, probably hesitating to leave her again, "But you have whole summer ahead, and Raven needs to work at the repair shop, and Bellamy would miss you, O, and all of our friends are waiting for you." 

"They are waiting for you too, Clarke," Raven crossed her hands over her chest, "You can stay at mine if you don't feel like being home-"

"Raven," the blonde cut her off, "We talked about this. I have to go. I have to do this. On my own," she said, before the girls could interrupt her, "I appreciate you, and I miss you, but please, let me do this."

"Alright," Raven finally agreed, "But if you need anything, you call us, okay? And we'll come, no matter what," she paid long look at Clarke, and the blonde gulped.

"Of coure, she lied, and smiling, she wrapped her arms around Raven's thin figure. The girls hugged for a while, both sobbing a bit, and then, she sniffled, "I will miss you." 

"We will miss you, too," Raven wiped off a tear and Octavia pursed her lips to stop herself from crying, "Be safe, Clarke. And remember, it will be okay." 

"Bye, Clarke," Octavia smiled, and hand in hand, the girls left. Clarke glanced at the room one last time, and trying to put herself together, she shut the door of the apartment and walked to the car.

She threw her bag on the backseat and started the engine, turning the radio on. She pulled off and slowly, she exited the resort and drove to the hallway.

She was tapping her fingers on the steering wheel to the rhythm of the song she was listening to when she spotted a familiar figure dressed in black and white plaid walking on the side of the road. She frowned to herself, and pulled off to the roadside, stopping behind Lexa. She honked and the brunette turned around, shielding her eyes from the sun.

"Going anywhere?" She asked, leaning from the window. Lexa put her bag on the road.

"Anya can't take me home, so I have to go get the bus," Lexa explained, Clarke bit her lip.

"Where is home?"

"TonDC, why?" She wondered, and Clarke smiled, stepping out of the car and leaning against it.

"Want a ride there? I need someone to keep me busy, anyways," she asked, and Lexa widened her eyes. It was obvious the proposition seemed incredibly dumb to Lexa by the way she looked Clarke up and down, but then, the taller girl shrugged to herself, and took her bag, walking towards Clarke.

"Sure, why the Hell not," she agreed, and put her bag next to Clarke's. Then, she stepped into the car, shut the door, and together, the girls rode to the highway, about to experience the best two months of their lives. And also the worst pain ever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that's it. It's not much, but I promise next chapter will be better. We will return to the wedding planning, and Clarke and Lexa will be forced to talk, and Clexa will tell us about their first day on the road.
> 
> Every comment is the best feedback I can get, and I am always so happy to read them. Thank you for reading, and if you want to help me with this story, comment below!

**Author's Note:**

> I wonder what happened that left Clarke so mad at Lexa, huh?? How will they work this situation out?
> 
> In the next chapter, we'll get to see how they met and how they decided to go on a road trip together. And I'd really appreciate your comments on this, so please, kudos/comments warm my heart up and give me the motivation to write. And publish. I'm annoying and needy and school is ruining me and writing is the only thing that keeps me sane


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